Woman screaming because she is angry

Better at Being Angry: A Guide to Managing Your Emotions

We all get angry sometimes, but do you feel like you are angry all the time? Does the smallest of things make you feel like lashing out? Or are you on the other end of the spectrum and someone who buries all your anger deep down?

Anger is a natural emotion that we all experience. It is a normal reaction to perceived threats or challenges. 

However, uncontrolled anger can lead to negative consequences, such as strained relationships, poor decision-making, and even health problems such as heart disease. It is important to get better at being angry so that we can manage our emotions in a healthy and productive way. And here are a few ways to do that:

Understanding Anger

Angry emoji on a phone

Understanding anger is an important first step in learning how to manage and express it in a healthy way. 

Anger is a natural emotion that everyone experiences from time to time, but it can become problematic when it is not managed properly. Anger can be triggered by a variety of things, including:

  • Frustration
  • Disappointment
  • Fear
  • Physical pain

The Importance of Self-Awareness

Better at being angry - woman looking at

Self-awareness is a critical component of managing anger in a healthy way.

When you are more self-aware, you are able to recognize your own emotions and understand how they are affecting you and those around us.

This can be a real challenge when it comes to anger, as it is often an intense and overwhelming emotion that can cloud your judgment and lead you to act impulsively. 

But, by developing greater self-awareness, we can learn to identify the early warning signs of anger, such as physical tension or racing thoughts, before they escalate into more extreme behaviors.m, the network in your body that tells your mind ‘danger is over, calm down.

Tips for Coping With Anger

Better at being angry - the lower half of woman meditating

There are several coping mechanisms that can help you manage your anger. 

1. Practice deep breathing

When you feel yourself getting angry, take a deep breath in through your nose, hold it for a few seconds, and then slowly exhale through your mouth. Repeat this several times until you feel yourself starting to calm down.

2. Take a break

If possible, remove yourself from the situation that is causing you to feel angry. Take a walk, listen to calming music, or engage in another activity that helps you relax and clear your mind.

3. Use positive self-talk

Challenge negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations. For example, instead of thinking “I can’t handle this,” tell yourself “I am strong and capable.”

4. Practice mindfulness

Focus on the present moment and observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment. This can help you stay grounded and prevent your anger from escalating.

Related: Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy: Everything You Need to Know

5. Exercise

Engage in physical activity, such as running or yoga, to release pent-up energy and reduce stress.

6. Use visualization

Picture a calming scene in your mind, such as a beach or a forest, and imagine yourself there. This can help you relax and reduce feelings of anger.

Related: Visualization Meditation: Transform Your Emotions (And Maybe Your Life)

7. Seek support

Talk to a trusted friend or family member about your anger and how you are feeling. Sometimes just having someone to listen can make a big difference.

8. Laugh it off

When tensions are high, sometimes a little humor can go a long way in defusing the situation. Using humor can help you confront the source of your anger and even help you let go of any unrealistic expectations you may have had.

9. Practice meditation

The regular practice of meditation can help to change the parts of the brain that react to anger. Meditation can teacher you to pause, understand, and react to whatever event has triggered you.

Related: Using Meditation for Anger Management

It’s important to keep in mind, however, that sarcasm should be avoided as it can cause hurt feelings and escalate the situation further. So, instead of using sarcasm, try using lighthearted humor to help bring a smile to everyone’s face and to ease the tension.

Why not try the Zenguided “Let Go of Anger” meditation:

Remember, coping with anger is a process and it may take time to find the strategies that work best for you. Don’t be afraid to experiment and try different techniques until you find what helps you the most.

Communication Skills

Better at being angry - a couple arguing

Effective communication is crucial in managing anger. Learning how to express your emotions in a clear and constructive way can help you avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. 

Part of the problem can be that you don’t truly understand how you feel, or why you feel that way. Meditation can help with that.

Active listening, such as repeating back what the other person said, can also help you with understand their perspective and respond in a more empathetic way.

Seeking Professional Help

Better at being angry: A therapy session
Better at being angry: When needed, seek professional help

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, we may still struggle with managing our anger. In such cases, it may be helpful to seek professional help. 

There are several types of therapy available, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy and anger management therapy, that can help us address the underlying causes of our anger and learn new coping skills.

The Takeaway

Getting better at being angry involves understanding the causes and types of anger, practicing self-awareness, developing coping mechanisms, improving communication skills, and seeking professional help if necessary. By learning how to manage our emotions more effectively, we can improve our relationships, make better decisions, and live a happier and healthier life.

Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is intended for educational and informational purposes only. It should not be construed as professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are experiencing symptoms of any mental health condition, we strongly advise consulting with a qualified healthcare professional.


No, anger is a normal and healthy emotion. However, uncontrolled anger can lead to negative consequences.

Self-reflection exercises, such as meditation and journaling, can help you become more aware of your emotions and recognize your triggers.

You can improve your communication skills by practicing active listening, expressing yourself in a clear and constructive way, and seeking feedback from others.

If your anger is causing significant distress or affecting your relationships, work, or daily life, it may be helpful to seek professional help.

There are several types of therapy available for anger management, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, dialectical behavior therapy, and anger management therapy. It is best to consult with a mental health professional to determine which type of therapy is best for you.

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